I’ve just returned to Australia after a year in Indonesia and nine months in Thailand. I knew to expect a readjustment period, and was pleasantly surprised when it wasn’t too hard – at first. I’ve come home enough times to think I’ve got it down pat! But a few weeks later, as the realities of finding a home and work seem like a chore, I’ve realised that even returning home in the best circumstances has it’s challenges.
I’m purposefully keeping an eye on the following to make the transition as smooth as possible. There are probably more and different things I could be working on too. I’d love to hear about them in the comments.
1. Knowing why I’m here
Sometimes we’re forced to come home when we don’t want to: to finish degrees, because we told our partner we would come back soon, family commitments, job commitments, etc.
I was ready to leave Thailand and I was excited to reconnect with my life back home, but I have definitely been caught looking at international postings over the last few days. I don’t think we can always be where we want to be, but it helps if you’re honest with yourself about why you’re here. I’m committed to being home now so I can attend to the important parts of life here for a while – family, friends, decent live music, film festivals…I could go on. Knowing that, when my mind wanders I can weigh up my options honestly and clearly.
An intern at my last organisation went home reluctantly because she needed to finish her Masters Degree. When she got home she was honest with herself about wanting to be somewhere else and accepted that she was committed to finishing her Masters. So she focused on her studies and spent her spare time building up her resume so when she was free to leave again she’d be a great candidate for an international posting.
There is another benefit to this thought process: you might discover that you don’t much feel like being home…and there is no great motivation for staying! So with that knowledge, you can get started on finding a new international opportunity ASAP.
Sometimes our feelings about home are more complicated than the examples above, so regardless of why you’re home and how you feel about it, it’s important to focus on other things you can do to make the transition easier. I find the following really important.
2. Keeping an eye on my diet
In the same way that it takes time to adjust to the diet in a new country, I find that coming home to a regular Australian diet can be pretty tough. It might also have something to do with the gusto with which I approach the sight of long lost delights of Australian cuisine.
In an extreme example, I was inundated with seriously crazy nightmares for a few weeks which I’m pretty sure can be blamed on the huge increase in preservatives in my diet. I try (with some success) not to overdo it when I get home – that means not too much food or booze. Mood and physical performance can be affected by your diet even if you’re not super sensitive to food. You’ll be relying on both things to remain stable in the first busy weeks and months of getting home.
3. Getting enough sleep
This is true all the time, but especially so when you get home. I was lucky enough to go on a holiday as soon as I got home, so no one minded too much when I slept 10 hours a day. I was exhausted from my job and made the most of the fresh air and silent nights to make up for god knows how many years of sleep deprivation. I’m sure it made the first crazy few weeks of being back so much more manageable.
4. Knowing my limits
It seems to make sense that you catch up with everyone as soon as possible, but there are only so many catch up lunches, dinners, coffees or beers a person can fit into a day. You don’t have to see everyone in the first week of returning, and they won’t mind if you say, “I’d love to catch up, how about next Friday?”
5. Diving right in
Somewhat converse to #3 and #4, don’t hold back from resuming life at home. Even if you’re not sure about old friendships, your old job, or how to deal with your racist uncle, don’t hide under the covers. If you can find a balance between getting back into it and giving yourself some breathing space, you’ve nailed it. I’ve started working from home already, and some days I wish I had more time off before I was back at work, but I also acknowledge that too much “time to think” can do more harm than good.
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If you’re finding it hard to readjust don’t hesitate to talk to professional about it – plenty of people do. If you ever wanted to shake up your sense of equilibrium and unleash the complex thought process (what am I doing with my life?, what are my values?, where do I belong?) then moving countries is a great way to do it.
